Materialism

Where do I begin. Why is it that Humans in general think they need to have the biggest, the best and the most? I am still trying to figure that out.

If I had more money than I knew what to do with I would not flaunt it. I would not buy the biggest house on the block or have the biggest and best things available. I would much prefer to live a simple life. Sure I would buy a few wanted items, but mostly needed items.

If I had plenty of money, I would not want to make myself a target for criminals. I would still wear average clothes to the stores, I would not drive a fancy car or have an expensive purse. I would not carry bank cards with me and I would only have enough cash for what I needed during that shopping trip.

I just don't understand why people put so much value in a person by the amount of money they make or what "things" they have to show it off. I put value in a person for how they treat others, not for what they own, what job they do or how much money they have.

It's time for the good people to take back the world

I have become very, very frustrated with a few things the past few years. I have come to the conclusion that the good people of the world need to take it back from the sick, disgusting, perverted, filthy, evil people.

I am tired of being walked all over just because I follow the rules and try not to cause trouble.
I am tired of turning on the news to here about 5 year olds being prostituted out and killed by the people that are suppose to care for and love them.
I am tired of people getting in their cars and acting like they are the only thing that matters on that road.
I am tired of sex and violence being the only thing on TV anymore.
I am tired of being treated like shit because I am not a size two model.
I am tired of ignorant old people living longer and being a waist of oxygen and space.
I am tired of eBay customers always trying to rip me off and eBay for giving them the power to do it.
I am tired of working outside of the home making it hard for me to take care of the family and home.
I am tired of sharing a planet with such sleazy horrible people.

I am tired of LIFE!

If we do not stand up now and start defending ourselves, when will it end. The harder the "good" people try to keep value and morals on this planet, the harder the perverted evil people fight against us. It is time to bring back capitol punishment. An eye for an eye. If you kill, you too shall be killed.

No more slaps on the wrist. Make prisons exactly what they should be....PRISONS. Don't give prisoners more than 2 meals a day. Don't give them a work out room, games, TV, books, and warm showers. Make them suffer as they have made others suffer. Make them work hard to earn the money that supports them.

Wow how time escapes so quickly

Well, Halloween came and went. I worked at a Haunted Attraction during October, so I did not get as much Halloween stuff done as I had first planned. But, I had a great time working there, so I am not complaining. I was sick on Halloween day, so I was not able to fully enjoy it however, we did manage to have a great Halloween anyway.

I can not believe Thanksgiving is only two weeks away. I am not ready for the holidays to hit quite so quickly. I am happy to say that I do have most of my Christmas shopping done. I have a little more to go.

My eBay store has slowed way down. I was expecting about 8 times the orders that I am getting for this time of year. But, with this economy, I am happy to have any sales at all.

I have to get going. I have a dentist appointment today :O I just wanted to pop in for a moment and say hi.

Halloween Stuff

Halloween is quickly approaching and I am going to start making some really fun decorations. Oh and my costume as well. I will post picks of the fun and interesting things that I come up with. I am sure it will be disturbing :)

As Dave would say, Ta Ta for now my children.

Life is what we make of it

I have been bothered by some things lately. One of them being that I have become more depressed. This started after I started taking the DQ to school on a daily basis. I wondered how that has caused stress and depression. I figured out that it comes from the music that she listens to. I hate it, but I let her listen to it anyway. Yes I know I am the parent, we don't have time for that discussion right now.

After listening (actually listening) to the lyrics of the music, I now have a much better understanding of why teens are all messed up these days. Yes this music discussion has been a huge issue in all generations of life, but this CRAP that they put on the radio these days is so bad that, as my dad would say "you had to be 18 and pay good money to see or hear that stuff in special theaters in my day" It is true. One song talks about "Gangsta Rap made me do it" It talks about cannibalism because "Gangsta rap made him do it", doing bad things because "Gangsta Rap made him do it". Almost all of the songs (I use the word songs very lightly) talk about having sex. Sex this, sex that, how many people are involved in the sex and where, why and when they will be doing it. There is one song that is just some stupid kid whispering into the microphone while what sounds like a porn track plays into the background. Other songs talk about buying whatever you want just because you want it and if you are not famous, you are scum.

That is telling kids that if they are not rich, famous and or having sex constantly, then they are no good. Plus it is just very depressing to hear that kind of decay and crap in our everyday lives and society makes it seem ok. No wonder kids are confused. The media is saying things are ok and parents are trying to teach kids that it is not. That is all VERY DEPRESSING!

Another example. Someone that I am very close to really enjoys very heavy metal music. Very loud, very disturbing lyrics. He watches TV programs about crimes, murders, rapes, and so on every night before he goes to bed. His choice of movies are all very loud, violent and gory. Well, guess what is going on with his health. Anxiety attacks. I really don't wonder why. If I listened to metal music that just screams profanities and anger into my head all day and then watched shows about evil people doing evil acts to people that they claimed to have cared about or loved, old people, children and strangers, I would be having anxiety attacks too.

We need to take a step back and really look at what we allow to influence our moods, behaviors and lives. If we don't, none of us will survive this so called life.

Take This Job And Stick It Up Your @SS!

I like my job. I like what I do here. I like having a job that pays well and the fact that I have my own quiet office is great.

BUT......I can't stand the behavior of about 3 people that work here.

My boss is a great guy and a decent boss, but he has some serious issues with how he treats peoples concerns and he lets a certain person take off WAY more time in one week then I could ever take off in a year. I am VERY PISSED about it. This person takes off a min of 1 day per week (usually Friday). She also gets away with coming in late on Mondays after long holiday weekends. I would have been fired if I even thought about doing that. The thing that pisses me off the most about my "boss" is that if I take a concern to him, he turns it all around on me. He says to other co-workers that "Carla is feeling picked on". I am suppose to keep track of back ordered items, so I asked if the warehouse manager (the person who receives shipments) could let me know shipments come in so that I can update the page. My boss said to me "So you want someone else to do your job for you?" NO! I just want to be notified when stuff comes in so that I can update things in a timely manner! JERK!

A certain co-worker (mentioned above) has taken the last 4 Fridays off, plus came in late on the Monday after the long 4th weekend. She takes early and long lunches whenever she feels like and she is now taking off more time, the Thursday before a holiday and coming in late on the Monday after! I am so freaking pissed...there are no words that can describe my anger right now.

I wrote an e-mail to my boss (who is in China this week) to let him know that I can no longer deal with the stress that is being caused because of the co-worker taking off so much freaking time. I would not have a problem with it if I did not have to do her job for her, making it so that I get into trouble for not getting my own job done.

I am at the end of my rope. I might be looking for another job soon. If anyone knows of anything, I would love to hear about it.

A Prediction

I have a prediction that we are going to have a very dry winter in 2009.

Why you ask? Because it has been raining ever sense Memorial Day. If we get all of this rain now, it means that we are not going to get it later in the year when we are use to getting it and or need it.

I have learned in life that when something great happens, like getting extra money for whatever reason, not too long down the road, that money is going to be needed for an unexpected event.

So, whenever I get an abundance of something, I hang onto it knowing that I am receiving it as a blessing because I will need it in the near future.

My theory is that we are getting an abundance of rain now because we will need it later when we would normally be getting the moister, but won't be.

The "New" American Dream

The American Dream is not what it use to be.

The things that use to be important to Americans was how well you treated each other, helping each other achieve dreams and have a good, clean and fun life. Raising a family was a goal for most people. Being part of and helping create a great community was important. People were friends because they enjoyed each others company. We use to have values, respect things and people. Honesty was expected and respected.

Now the "American Dream" has become superficial. There is no substance left in it. It is just all about how you look, how much money you make and how many people recognize your "perfect" face.

People now don't care about family, helping others, or being honest. All that matters is that they get their greedy little hands on everything they want. They don't care who they walk over or harm to get it. They want what they want and will do what it takes to get it.

Some people want a "perfect" body, so they torture themselves by starving, exercising (too much), getting surgeries and so on. Other people just simply want money so they can do whatever they want whenever they want. Some people just want fame. They will do whatever it takes to get it, not caring about who or what they destroy on the path to getting there.

People now judge each other on what size of a house you live in, what kind of car you drive, what fancy clothes you wear, where you get your hair done and how much you spend on that 5oz salad at lunch.

Some people will ONLY be friends with other people who "have it all" just because they want to be around those things, not because they really care anything about the person that they are hanging out with.

The worst part of it all is that nobody wants to WORK HARD for anything that they need or want. They find ways to get money without earning or deserving it.

This is all SO STUPID! We need to get back to what this country was really built on and for. HARD WORKING, CARING PEOPLE!

I grew very poor. But, I am not any less of a person because of it. In fact, I am glad that I did because I can now appreciate things that I am sure many people can not appreciate because they have never gone without. They have always been spoiled.

We did not need money to have a good life. We were raised with values and taught to respect and not judge others. We were financially poor but spiritually rich. We were loved and cared about. We did not always have food to eat, but we always had love in our home.

When I say that I grew up poor, I do not mean that I grew up without getting everything that I wanted. Up until I was 14 years old, our family of 6 (Mom, Dad and 3 siblings) lived in a 2 bedroom single wide mobile home. My parents put a wall between the one bedroom to split it in two. I shared my 1/2 room with my two sisters while my brother had his own 1/2 room. I think my room was about 6 feet wide by 10 feet long. We had a bunk bed and a dresser in there. That was all there was room for. But, at least I had a roof over my head, a bed to sleep in and a dresser to put clothes in. We did not have everything we wanted, but we did have a good life and grew up to be good people.

My grandmother grew up "dirt poor"....literally. That term was used when people could not afford flooring in their homes. My grandmothers family was one of them. Her family had one large bed that they all slept in, 8 kids I think. The house was very small and had a dirt floor. But, my grandmother is one of the most honest and wonderful woman that I have ever met in my life. She is a true insperation.

As Americans, we need to stop putting the value of a person in the amount of money they have or what they look like and start putting the value in what type of person they are and how they treat others. We need to bring integrity and honesty back into our lives. We need to make family and each other our number one priority. Not money and selfishness.

We have become a very selfish country. It is not surprising that most other countries hate us at this point.

I was thinking of remodeling my bathroom

BUT NOT LIKE THIS!

I just want to give a big F___ U to the world!

All you jackass drivers out there need take your stupid ass cars and drive them off cliffs...I hope you die!

Anal jackasses need to take your stupid analness and shove it up your ass where it belongs.

Bosses can take their higher than mighty attitudes and drowned themselves in them.

Most "Mormons" need to crawl back under the rock that they dared pull themselves out from under.

And all you idiots that post rude comments on message boards just because that is all that you have left to do in life, can go choke on your own egos.

I don't know what I did in a past life to warrant me going to Hell (Earth) for however long my prison term here will be, but I sure will be happy when it is time for me to leave this lice (they call themselves humans) infested planet.

I can't wait for the day that I no longer have to "be nice" just to be shit upon by the lice of this world. I will wait out my time like everyone else, but I sure in the Hell ain't gonna like it!

If I ever get cancer....Please let me die, don't make me suffer so you can torture me more.
If I slit my throat....Sit there an listen to it gurgle while I take my last almost breaths.
If I take pills and go into a coma rather than dying.....Take me off any machines and watch me slip quietly or hopefuly not so quietly out of this body.
If I ever buy a gun...don't take it away from me, it might be my only way out of Hell.

If you read this and want to lock me up and or put me in a streight jacket...do it...I don't fucking care. There is nothing left in this world for me anymore.

Whats with the weather?

For as long as I can remember (sometimes that is not very far back) I can not recall a June that has been so gray,cold and wet.

I am happy that we are getting the much needed water, but I am use to June being a lot warmer than this one is being.

I finally have a yard of my own to enjoy, landscape and spend time in. But with this weather, I can't do much of anything out there.

I guess I have to just accept that I can not pick and choose the days that I want sun and the days that I don't mind the cold gray rain :)

I am learning......The hard way

So, I am learning things about myself. Somewhat because Dave has pointed some things out to me. Like I take on way to many things at one time.

I never realized how many projects I start and never have time to finish just because I take on too much at once.

The past 8 months have been very busy and full of stressful projects. Most of the stress I brought on myself.

Oct - Got married.
Oct - Started a 6 month Stamping Up class.
Nov - Got dogs. I SHOULD have waited until we KNEW for sure that we were going to be able to get the house that we were trying for before getting the dogs.
Nov/Dec - Bought a house. This by its self was enough adventure for a year.
Jan - Getting things moved and settled into the new house.
March - Began "landscaping" with no knowledge or tools for it.
April - Started garden from seeds (without having plans for the garden area of in the yard.)
May - Got a large above ground pool (without having the space in the yard ready for it.)
May - Decided to add a new branch to my business (that is taking up much time that I don't have).
June - Took on more debt to get a computer that I need to run my business. I have ran my Internet stores without a computer in my home for many years now, but I think I could do better if I could work on them from home instead of before, during lunch breaks and after work on my work computer.

All of this with the everyday adventures. Prom, B-Days, Holidays and so on.

I do take on way to much all at once. I am learning that I need to take a step back and deal with one project at a time. I need to learn to have patience and plan for things better. Like, money, yard space, time and other such things.

I guess I just see an opportunity and I want to jump on it without thinking about everything that is involved. I just want to do things. I don't want to wait. I don't want to let the opportunity pass me by because I feel like I won't get the opportunity again (that was not the reason for getting married).

As Dave says, I jump off the cliff without a parachute. I guess I just expect that I can either make one on my way down or hope that there is a rescue team at the bottom when I get there.

From now on, I will make sure I have a parachute and a backup parachute for the next adventure that I get myself into.

So Very Frustrated!

This may be a long and very negative rant, so READ AT YOUR OWN RISK!

I am so very frustrated with a bunch of different things right now.

I have been digging and digging rock and clay dirt for at least 2 hours a night (usually more) for two weeks now, just to accommodate this stupid pool (that the DQ JUST HAD TO HAVE). I wanted it too, but not this bad. I have finally given up. This project has caused much sanity loss, a pound of sweat, a bunch of bruises and sleepless nights because of aching muscles. It has beat me. I have NO MORE to give. But what frustrates me the most is that today, Dave told me that I was giving up. What the hell ever happened to knowing your limits and not pushing yourself over the edge to the point of death. I had given it all I had to give a week into it, but I just kept going. Now I don't even want to step one foot out in the yard (which is the place that I use to always want to be). I can not even so much as look at that stupid swimming pool project without wanting to jump off a bridge. DON'T tell me that I am giving up when I am just simply trying not to kill myself either by working to hard or on purpose because I just can not take anymore!

Onto my next stress.

The DQ wants a computer so she can get that stupid Sims 3 game. We have had many discussions about getting a new computer or getting the swimming pool (mentioned above) and we had decided on the pool because we did not have one of those, but we did have access to Dave's computer. Well, we got the pool (that is now just a thorn in my butt) and she is now complaining that she wants a computer. When does it ever end. I want, I want, I want! I can't take anymore. I work my ass off just to pay the bills and they are not ever paid on time. What the hell more can I do. I work a full time job, plus a couple of internet stores and I am working on starting up a home canning in home demonstration /sales business just to have grocery money. Again.....I can't take anymore of this!

There is more.

The DQ who is now 17 would like to get a job. She wants me to spend my free time (the 5 min a day that I have) to help her find one. I don't have a problem with her wanting a job. I don't have a problem with helping her find a job. But, has anyone seen the job market lately? It is not good. So, for a 17 year old special needs child, there is NOT MUCH out there, but she thinks that I should be able to pull off a miracle and somehow come up with a job for her. I have offered to have her help me with my job projects, but NO WAY will she do that, she thinks that is to un-cool. Well, welcome to the real world, you sometimes have to take a job that you don't want, to get experience and or because there is nothing else out there.

I know that these are just small trivial things compared to what most people are going through right now (job losses, home losses and so on). So, I am not having a pity party, I am just simply blogging about my frustrations at the moment.

Def Leppard Concert Here We Come

I did not think I would ever get the chance to see my fave 80's band Def Leppard in concert ever again. Partly because I am old and well, so are they.

I was lucky enough to see them in concert about 20 years ago and they were great. I have always wanted to see them again.

They are coming to Utah in August with Poison and Cheap Trick. I have seen all of theses bands before and I really enjoyed each of their shows.

I am beyond excited!

Long Holiday Weekend

I was so looking forward to a nice long holiday weekend of relaxing, setting up the pool, BBQing and planting the garden.

Things don't always go as planned.

My weekend started out with a letter from my bank informing me that my bank card number has been compromised because someone hacked into the credit card system that it was issued under and stole the numbers. Because it is a long weekend the only thing I could do was call the after hours number to have my card blocked. But, I had wait for the whole weekend to call the bank and get a new card issued. Plus I use my card almost every day, so it was hard to get use to not having it available. I am lucky that my card number was not used for any purchases and that no money was taken from my account. So, I am not complaining.

For the most part, the rest of the weekend went well. The weather did not cooperate so the pool did not get set up, but I did get the garden planted, we had a nice BBQ and went to my niece's B-Day party. She just turned 3. It was nice to see the family and have yummy cake and ice cream. And sleeping in for 3 days is always welcoming.

What's With This Amercian Idol Crap?

I am not a huge fan of American Idol, but I do like to see someone who works hard make their dream come true.

There were only 2 or 3 singers that I liked. One of which got booted long ago. The other two made it to the top 3. Actually I liked all 3 that made it to the top, but only one can win. I think that Adam had way toooo much confidence in himself and deserves to be put in his place by NOT winning.

The real problem I have with this whole thing is that these contestants went on this show in an attempt to make a dream come true. One of them got that and then suddenly it is being called an "Upset". Uhm, America voted, America created the winner and now they are all crying that he won? That does not make sense to me.

My theory is that it is just all the sore looser hard core Adam fans in the media that are crying and trying to take a great thing for Kris and turn it into some sort of controversy. Let Kris have his moment. Stop crying because your guy did not win. GET OVER IT and put out some good stories about Kris, who worked just as hard to be there and rightfully WON!

UHG!

I finally got the pool of my dreams. Well, at least the pool of my dreams that my budget and yard would allow for.

I am very excited about getting the pool, but leveling the ground to set the pool up has become a monster of a job. Our yard has a slope. I knew that I would need to level the ground to put up the pool. I don't have a problem with that, but I did not realize how much of a slope I was going to have to deal with. By the time I am done leveling the ground, I might just be in good swimsuit shape :)

All I can say is that this had better be worth my effort when it is all said and done......UHG!

Facebook is an interesting thing

I have to admit that I finally started using my Facebook account a few months ago. I signed up over a year ago, but I never really understood it.

I am still learning how things work, but I have noticed a few things that I think are interesting about it.

At first I had a friend or two and I never really looked anyone up. The first real friend request I got was so exciting. Someone actually remembered me and took the time to look me up. How special I felt. We chatted for a bit, sent a few e-mails, responded to each others posts and then as quick as it all started, it sort of ended. We are still "friends" but we do not chat, e-mail or respond to each others posts anymore. I think that is partly because after 20 years of not knowing someone, you don't really know them like you did. You can't just pick up where you left off. You don't know what offends them, or if they understand your personality. Because you can not see facial expressions and or here the tone of a voice, you don't know if what they are writing is meant the way that you take it.

On the other hand, I have 2 really good friends that it seems like we did pick up right where we left off. We seem to understand each others responses and it is like we were friends for all those years.

Then there is the family side of things. I love to be able to keep up on how my siblings are doing. The posts about what silly things their kids are doing always brightens my day. Then there is my husbands family. They all live out of state, so I have not met most of them and because of not spending time with them, I don't really know them. Through Facebook, I can get a pretty good idea of who they are and learn about them. It is a bridge into their world so we can get to know each other.

I think that overall, Facebook is a great thing. I like that I can hop in and see how old friends or family are doing without having to feel like I am interrupting their day with a phone call or a visit to their house when they are busy. I also like the goofy quizzes and the results.

So Very Tired

As I have blogged about a few blogs ago, the dogs have been keeping us from getting any sleep for two weeks.

I am so tired at this point that I don't feel anything. I don't feel tired, awake, alive or dead. I just exist.

As I found out today, I can not even tell the difference between a Pop-Tart and a Hot Pocket.
We don't have a vending machine at work, we just have treats that we can take and mark on a sheet so they will be paid for out of our paychecks.
On the sheet each item has a space that we mark when we take it. I found out today that a couple of times that I took a Pop-Tart, I marked the Hot Pocket space. I don't ever eat the Hot Pockets!
I am surprised I have not driven off the road from falling asleep yet.

I think I NEED SOME SLEEP

Angry Bee

I was attacked by an angry bee yesterday.

I was just out doing some yard work and along came a very angry bee. Lucky for me it was just one angry bee and not a whole colony of them.

I don't know what I did to upset or even attract the angry bee, but it came at me with full intentions of stinging me. I ran away screaming and throwing my arms all over the place (the neighbors probably think I am crazy). I got away from the bee thinking all would be fine. So, I went back to the yard work and it came at me again. This happened about 6 times.

I was going to give up and go into the house and just finish my yard work later. As I started toward the porch, that dang bee came at me again. I got away from it but then noticed my dog jumping all over the yard and spinning in circles. I was confused until I saw that the bee had landed on the top of Jimmy's ear. I don't know if the bee stung poor Jimmy or not. I guess the bee finally got a victim and I never saw it again.

Bees have never bothered me before, but now I am a little afraid of them.

I have been stung only one time and it was a Wasp, not a bee.